How annoying it feels to have something go wrong…. it is truly frustrating, firstly. Also if it is something that a friend has gotten instead, well you feel that ounce of jealousy.
Well going back to, I will say 1 month and half ago, there was this guy. I would say I was pretty head over heals for this guy, I mean come on, he was cute, sweet, comforting and dressed really well. Oh and he smelt AMAZING (hahaha). Anyway I was sorta hoping to take him to formal, yeah? well long story short, he and my friend are going together…. worst part? This girl won’t fucking shut up about it -_- and continuing on my last post (I think), I had this horrible dream that they will be sooooo absorbed in each other they will forget me completely…. and on top of that this friend had asked me to stay away from him on the night…. bitch? maybe…. but even though some would say this is an act of betrayal, since she knew I liked him, and she accepted willingly, on the other hand I only blame myself. And of course I am hurt and angry as shit.
So where do I go now? Well have asked a friend to formal, but atm I am sorta unsure… I mean he is soo lovely and all, but he is very social and I know he will leave me to talk to others and perhaps make new friends, putting me in the position of being alone and forced to watch the two (my crush and friend), spend the night together…. So this then prompts two (or three) other possible solutions.
- I can ask my best-friend to formal, and then just sign the form saying I am Lesbian or something
- Not go completely
- Go alone (which I rather not)
But they all don’t seem 100% right, I sorta have my heart on taking him…Yeah I know, this all seems so trivial, and I agree, but my mind and heart can’t fucking seem to get over it, or forget it, because of my friend…. you know what, at this point I am soooo close to just killing my friend, you know just so I can be all like “oh problem solved” but deep down I know it won’t be that easy… in fact it will be messy as….